Updated: Jun 27, 2021
I turn 30 in a few weeks. Sometimes I look at myself and still feel like I’m 18. The questions roll around in my head; why would anyone want to listen to what I have to say?? Or you don’t know what you’re talking about, you don’t have enough experience. You are definitely not qualified to do THAT…
Then on the other side I often feel too old. I volunteer with the youth group at my church, and the voices begin again. Aren’t they going to get tired of you at some point? You’ll soon become too old for them to think you’re cool. Anyway, you should have your own kids by now… you’re going to be an old mom.
As I look at these things and lean into what God has to offer me, I am reminded of his faithful love. Of his ability to call people when they are truly unqualified and make them qualified. I’m also reminded of his ability to make the critical voices cease. I was in a time of prayer this week and in my mind, I saw as I got closer to Jesus, the darkness and the lies just fell off me. Like they were being repelled by his glory.
As I have been memorizing Psalm 118 this month my version of scripture says, “Hostile nations surrounded me, and I destroyed them all in the authority of the Lord.”
What hostile nations are you coming up against? Maybe not in the literal sense, like Brazil is declaring war on you, but maybe in the spiritual sense. What places are you walking where you are being fed lies of the enemy? Where does the darkness creep in?
For me, it’s in those places where God calls me to something “Big.” To walk with people in pain I haven’t been in, to impart wisdom on people older than me, to share knowledge I’ve learned even though I’m not an expert. These things feel big, they feel like a step of faith and they feel like growing more into who God made me to be.
My 20s were marked by so much of a desire to get approval from other people. I still value words of affirmation, but God is reminding me that I don’t need other people to give me permission to do what he is calling me to do. He has called me, and he has equipped me.
Let’s take this to the garden. How ridiculous would it be for a seed to ask permission of the soil before it pushed the soil out of the way? Or for a sprout to ask permission of the weeds to grow strong in the sun? They don’t need permission by anything other than the one who planted them in the ground and encouraged them to grow.
As we look to the areas where we are coming to a head with the hostility of the powers of darkness, may we stand confidently in the name of Jesus. Knowing that with his name and under his authority, the hostile nations will be defeated.